I wrote in the last issue of Nexus about the challenges of finding balance in life. Trying to find balance with the staples in life—such as eating and sleeping, or multitasking with school, work, paying rent, and having fun—can be pretty overwhelming.
What many students (such as myself) find difficult is the time we take to actually practice self-care. I’m not just talking about going to the gym or taking a bubble bath, although both are valid. I’m thinking about the quest to figure out who we are, what our roles are in the world, in society. With all the pressure that students are under, however—studying, working, attending class, volunteering, student council, book clubs, sports, writing for the student newspaper—it’s all we can do to not burn out, let alone find time to find ourselves.
I’ve been trying to figure out what will keep me in check, keep me from burning out, keep me somewhat sane. I’ve dealt with more than a few major life changes in the last couple years. Both my father and my life partner died (within two months of each other), and then three months ago my godfather, who was a major support in my life, died. I’ve always wondered whether to write about this or not, but I’m deciding to not hold back. I’ll add that these events brought back an ugly truth to my own life, which was a hefty drinking habit, something that I had stayed abstinent from for six years. Needless to say, the numbing of my own pain was not self-care, it was just a great way to mess up my life fairly fast. Now I have to find my balance with school, writing, and support groups, both for grief and my own recovery.
Self-care will mean something different to us all. It could mean just making our bed and remembering to wash, brush, and make sure our clothes match. Maybe it’s taking our dog for a walk (or in my case, my two cats). Maybe it’s finding a spiritual path, whether it’s religion, nature, or a guided ayahuasca experience.
I believe that trying to find meaning and balance is all about what can bring me some clarity and peace while still being able to handle the different situations that life throws my way without resorting to old and unproductive solutions.
The balancing act is hard; it often seems impossible. I guess it just comes down to where the idea comes from. Look straight ahead and try to not topple off the beam.