Do you feel as if you are drowning in a sea of whizzing sounds, flashing lights, and whirling words? Are you standing on the outside of clear communication, wishing you had an invitation inside? Let me explain why seeing yourself on the outside of communication—instead of seeing yourself as part of it—is precisely the problem.
As we all run around campus like chickens with our heads cut off, we may realize the honeymoon phase of the fall semester is ending and that we must keep up with the constant communication thrown our way. But instead of practicing what we’ll say to a friend or staring at a blank screen waiting to write perfection, you need to simply wing it. Of course, practice may indeed make perfect, but perfection comes at a cost, in the form of time, stress, and energy.
To clarify, there is more than a duality of good or bad, success or failure. If you want to ask a question during a lecture, for example, you don’t need to spend five minutes thinking of how to word it, because you actually already know how to. There isn’t a bad question that you may be embarrassed by, and there isn’t a smart question; there is just a question, an assembly of words.
Thinking there is a multitude of ways to say something (forgetting the thesaurus for a moment) is silly. You already know what you know. When we centre or split something, we waste time and energy trying to perfect one thing or distance ourselves from another thing, almost always sacrificing quality for quantity.
For example, multitasking implies many things, one of which is that we are capable of truly and fully doing multiple things at once—something the social sciences have disproven time and time again. If you don’t believe me, try reading this while listening to a friend, and try to understand everything during your conversation. (Go ahead, I’ll wait.)
So why do we still believe we can do it all at once? Possibly, our brains can process things like language so quickly that the impression of finding the perfect thing to communicate seems reasonable. Obviously, I’m sure many of us can attest to the fact that saying the “right” thing isn’t easy when we try.
Admittedly, this may seem idealistic or even complicated (no joke about false dichotomies intended). Eventually, if realized often enough, you can begin to let your brain work by itself without overthinking what you have to communicate. Whatever the case may be, you can only trip over yourself if you are multitasking. Attempting to bop it, smash it, and possibly even smack it leaves you to miss a few pull-its in between.